haircut sir !

[Baloo]

A guy stuck his head into a barber shop and asked, "How long before I
can get a haircut?"

The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, "About
2 hours." The guy left.

A few days later the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked,
"How long before I can get a haircut? "

The barber looked around at the shop and said, "About 3 hours." The
guy left.

A week later the same guy stuck his head in the shop and asked, "How
long before I can get a haircut?"

The barber looked around the shop and said, "About an hour only." The
guy left.


The barber turned to a friend and said, "Hey, Bill, do me a favour.
Follow that guy and see where he goes. He keeps asking how long he
has to wait for a haircut, but then he doesn't ever come back".

A little while later, Bill returned to the shop, laughing hysterically.
The barber asked, "So where does that guy go when he leaves?"

Bill looked up, tears in his and said,

"To your wife"

[Baloo]

A woman is standing , looking in the bedroom mirror.
She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, "I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly.
I really need you to pay me a compliment."
Her husband say's, "well your eyesight is just perfect"
__________________

[Baloo]

I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary? "
It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation.
"Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said.
So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"

[Baloo]

An elderly couple made a deal that whoever died first would come back and tell them about afterlife.

Husband dies first and made contact "Gladys"
'Is that you Fred?'
"Yes iv come back to tell you what its like. I have sex then breakfast,then off to the golf course,then more sex. I sunbathe,then have sex again.
Lunch ,romp round the golf course,then sex all afternoon.
Then supper and more sex.

'Oh Fred ,you must be in heaven'

"No i'm a feckin rabbit now

[fabr]